June 27, 2017

hi

P/s; ni post emosional sikit.

Well, i have to admit that i missed you so badly,E. Idk. Moving on is the hardest part to do. It has been months now but still i can't get over you. You look like you are doing totally fine without me. How could you do that? Kau macam tak terkesan pun dengan everything. You knw, you meant the whole world to me. You took me for granted. That what my friends said. Idk benda tu sekadar nak sedapkan hati or what. But still, kau tahu aku tak percaya semua tu en. I know you way better than them. Diaorang nampak apa yang kau buat, but not the true you. Man, this is hard. And i'm making this hard on myself. Look, i'm a kind of girl yang once i fall, i fall hard. There's nothing in between. Fuck this feeling. Lately aku mimpi banyak pasal kau, idk why. But apa yang pasti, it's not a good sign i guess. Sebab in my dream, kau macam cuba untuk menjauh. Contoh aku boleh bagi, kalau aku mai nak duduk sebelah kau, kau akan pindah tempat lain. That's it. I thought bila aku dah kat ump aku boleh lah move on. Mak aih susah babeng. Aku rasa macam nak nangis setiap hari. Maybe this is the price that i have to pay. Ye lah, i gave you my all but then, kau tak pun. Aku boleh terima we are not meant to be together kepe, tapi yang aku takleh nak terima is, kenapa kau macam menjauh? Well, i have a few theories. First, mungkin kau nak bagi ruang kat aku untuk  move on. Kau taknak aku tunggu kau macam orang gila. Secondly, you already have someone else? Hit me with the truths. Kamon, i need answers! Third point, mungkin aku yang beriya. Maigawd putt, berbuih mulut suruh orang give their heart a break kau tu haa, tak reti nak guna nasihat sendiri ke?!

Sigh. You knw, aku tahu apa aku patut buat. Tapiiiii, entahlah nak. Hati aku still takleh nak terima anything. Aku jadi numb and idk. Warggghhhhhh, nak phase ni habis awal :(

May 13, 2017

Assalamualaikum and Hi

Rindu. Siapa tak pernah ada perasaan rindu enn. Tipu lah kalau takde. Manusia ni penuh dengan emosi. Macam-macam kita boleh rasa. Marah,bengang, happy and sedih. Macam-macam kita boleh rasa. Tapi yang paling tak boleh blah ialah, perasaan rindu. Weh, as i typing this shit, aku rasa skema gila. Ayat tak boleh lagi baku je enn. Lol. Well, i am not expecting someone will read this trash. Kadang-kadang aku macam tak tau nak luah dekat siapa my exact feelings. 'Cause i know no one understands lewl. So yeah, blog is my last resort. Huhuhuhuhuhu. I feel free to share my thoughts or anything cuz it will bring no harm to anyone. So back to my bebelan which is; rindu. Rindu is a very strong word. I can't deny. Perasaan rindu ni boleh datang tetiba je. For examples, kau duduk kat kelas tengah study statistics and suddenly kau rasa lain macam. Hati ni rasa macam tak tenang macam tu lah. Tetiba rasa rindu, Kalau sebut pasal rindu, mesti lah kau tujukan kat orang enn. Ada ke yang rindu handphone dia? Mungkin ada. Tapi more kepada seseorang tu sendiri. It happened to me all the time. Waktu tengah lunch ni pun,adoiyai, boleh pulak rindu kat mama dengan ayah. Jadi apa aku buat bila perasaan tu datang? Haaaa, aku makan dengan sedu sedan. Tahan nangis le,sebabnya aku tengah makan and member kat depan kot,jatuh saham aku. Plus, kalau aku menangis tetiba tak ke pelik? Huhuhuhuhuhuhu. Ye lah,orang semua elok2 tengah makan, suddenly you cry. Aku pun boleh jadi pelik tau.

Tu baru rindu kat parents, belum lagi rindu kat yang tersayang lagi enn. Haaa, ni parah. Bila kau dah start rindu kat someone tu, mula lah mood swing kau mai bagai tsunami and angin kencang ribut taufan semua mai serentak. Member sekeliling pun boleh naik menyampah tau bila benda ni jadi. Aku tak merujuk pada sesiapa. Benda jadi kat diri sendiri so aku boleh faham struggle tu. Hiks. Jadi,apa ubat pada rindu ni. Ceh senang je, dah kalau kau rindu kat someone tu, give them a call. Kalau malu sangat kau text je lah. Kalau nak nampak old skool sikit, kau hantar surat through burung merpati. K, gurau hambar je petang-petang ni. Lol. Kenapa aku came up with this topic? Simply because aku bosan and yeah, aku rindu mak ayah aku. Takde kesayangan lagi alhamdullilah so kasih sayang dan attention aku of course lah 100% kat mama and ayah. Depa patt rasa excited sebab bukan senang aku nak bagi my full attention kat orang. Huhuhuhuhuhu. Okay, itu je kot aku nak taip.

Tschuss! Bis spater!

xoxo;
putt